What is a badass? Well in a nutshell it’s a person that you are in awe of and at the same time forces you to curl in a fetal position and weep, because you’ll never be as amazing as them. With that in mind here are the 10 most badass people who ever lived.
#10. Agustina of Aragon
Agustina was a sweet lady who brought some apples to the soldiers who guarded the city of Zaragoza during the Napoleon invasion of Spain in 1808. When she arrived she saw soldiers being shredded with French bayonets and the remaining running away from their posts. She didn’t like that, so she did some shredding herself with a loaded cannon at point-blank range. When Spanish soldiers saw a lone woman taking care of cannons they said… hey we can do this. And just like that she became a national inspiration. During the attacks she later enlisted in the army and became the only woman to rise to the rank of captain and earned a nickname the Spanish Joan of Arc
Rasputin was just frustratingly hard to kill. That pretty much sums up his badassery. But you will agree that this is a neat skill to have. Rasputin was a peasant and a religious fanatic who claimed that he had some special magically religious power or something like that, but because of that he ended up being a trusted and close friend to Tsar Nicholas II and his wife Alexandra Feodorovna. Some of the people didn’t like that and they didn’t like his growing influence on the royal family and their decisions that affected the nation. Unfortunately for Rasputin, those people were important and influential as well and they decided that he has gotta go. Here comes the frustratingly hard to kill part Rasputin was poisoned but that didn’t work. Then he was shot; he fell down got up, punched his assassin and ran away. They caught him, beat him and fired a few bullets into him just in case and threw him in the river. He was found dead after that, of course. Anything else would be ridiculous. But believe it or not he actually drowned all those bullets, poison and beating did nothing to him. His kryptonite was apparently water.
#8. Shavarsh Karapetyan
Shavarsh is practically a real-life superhero. He is also retired world and European champion and finswimming and a 10 time world record breaker in it. It involves swimming with fins… obviously, snorkeling, holding breath while swimming underwater. You get the point. It is pretty impressive to be a champion in a weird sport like that, but this isn’t why Karapetyan is on the list.
Reason for that is an incident in 1976 he was training in a lake when a bus full of people from the dam fell into the lake. Karapetyan managed to find the bus in zero visibility conditions, break a window and drag 20 people to shore one by one. He then proceeded to rest for the following 45 days. Rest in a coma. That cold water and glass cuts and injuries can do to a man. That ended his sports career, but he didn’t mind. He had a new hobby now. 9 years later, he rescued some folks from a burning building and earned multiple severe burns on his body but he was too much of a badass not to recover completely.
#7. Arthur Rimbaud
You may be wondering what a French modern poet is doing on this list, but bear with me on this one. Rimbaud is a child prodigy and he led a ridiculously badass life after that. He started writing poems when he was in primary school and immediately left an impression so naturally he got bored with it and stopped completely at the age of 20. He then went to travel across Europe on foot, enlisted in the Dutch colonial army and went with them to Java and what is today Indonesia, ran into the jungle and returned to France hiding on a ship. He seemed to enjoy the experiences like that because then he went to Ethiopia, and became a coffee and arms dealer. Rimbaud was a pioneer in coffee training in Europe and introduced it to now famous Ethiopian coffee. Not bad for a teenage poetic genius sadly he died probably of bone cancer at the age of 37. He is remembered as one of the best French poets of all time and probably the only poet soldier deserter arms and coffee merchant combo to date.
#6. Maria Oktyabrskaya
Maria lived in Siberia during the world or when she received tragic news. Her husband was killed by Nazis two years earlier. She did not take that news well. She sold all of her possessions in a blind rage, bought a tank and named it ‘the fighting girlfriend’. She wanted to serve some sweet revenge herself, the Soviet Army allowed her to drive it and join them in the battles after she completed her training, she quickly became very skilled at tank battles. She even repaired her tank herself. During the battle when bullets and shells were flying all around her of course like a true badass. She served her revenge well destroying multiple machine-gun nests and artillery guns but then in 1944 she had her last battle and succumbed to injuries in a war hospital.
#5. Simo Hayha
Simo was a man on this list with definitely the most badass and menacing nickname: ‘white death’. That can give you a pretty good hint about his line of work. He was a Finnish soldier who fought in World War two and his weapon of choice was a sniper but not just any sniper. He used a very short five foot three inch m-28 sniper without telescopic sight, because who needs that on a rifle that is used to kill people from hundreds of feet away, right? He actually preferred the plain iron sight because it made him harder to spot from a distance. Camouflage was kind of his thing too he wore a completely white suit from head to toe, stuffed some snow in his mouth so his breath was invisible and did his job. And he did it well. He killed 505 Russian soldiers. Just the confirmed deaths in a hundred days and that is a world record. But probably the most badass thing about him is that he was apparently invincible. Russians tried to kill him on multiple occasions and finally shot him in the head and left him for dead. Except he wasn’t. He recovered from head wounds returned home and enjoyed his life raising dogs and deer hunting both probably without the sniper.
#4. Genghis Khan
Genghis Khan was the founder and emperor of the largest empire of mankind. He did not just step on the throne and exist as an emperor, he actually made Mongolia the biggest empire ever Genghis khan was a brilliant war tactician. He planned and unleashed raids and attacks on nearby territories with ease, but he also advanced his empire in lots of other ways. For example: he set up the mongols writing system, he preached religious tolerance and unity among his people and tribes in between brutal killing sprees of course.
#3. Theodore Roosevelt
Theodore Roosevelt is just one of those people who deserve not only an article about them, but the whole book and there are plenty already. It is hard to list all the badass things he did in his life but here’s some of it. He was the president of the USA. Pretty neat accomplishment on its own. In his youth he balanced brain and body being one of the most talented Harvard students and an accomplished boxer at the same time. Hee loved nature, being in it, conserving it and bringing impressive hunting trophies from it. Besides that he climbed Mont Blanc, wrote books, discovered a new River in Brazil, led the attack in a war with Spain on Cuba, captured criminals, received a Nobel Peace Prize, allowed women and Jewish people to work in the police force for the first time and many many other things. Certainly one of the most versatile and admirable human beings in a position of that importance.
Khutulun was the daughter of Kaedu, the most powerful ruler of Central Asia in the 13th century. She was an extremely skilled and powerful warrior and routinely rode into battles with her father. Although that is pretty badass, there is one thing that just pushes her over the edge into unbelievable awesomeness. When it came time for her to marry, she agreed… but under one condition: the man who wants to marry her, must defeat her in wrestling. If she beats him, she gets his horse. Fair enough. Do you think her suitors thought so too? How hard can it be to pin down a chick in a wrestling match. Well it seems she wasn’t talking to talk, she walked the walk. Ten thousand horses found their new home in her stables. She actually defeated ten thousand men in wrestling. Think about that. It is unbelievable that so many men wanted to marry one woman, let alone that all of them lost to her in the end. She married one man but she didn’t wrestle him, if she did we all know what the outcome would be.
#1. Jack Churchill
There is not much you can do to beat the level of badassery that ran through Jack Churchill’s veins and mind. Just imagine the horror of World War II and then imagine if you are fighting through it with a longbow, Scottish broadsword and a set of bagpipes; because hey why not. That is exactly what Churchill did and it is as insane as it is badass. By the way he was a Scottish as Fidel Castro. He fought all over the world, ran into gunfire, took and released prisoners, and his favorite thing was catching German soldiers by surprise, mowing them with his medieval weapons while screaming wildly. Like I said at the beginning there’s not much you can do to beat that.
Watch The Video Below! 👇